First Personal Blog: The Quest for Happiness

To blog or not to blog, that is the question.

Actually, it's more like: Will I blog or not?

Time will tell. Blogging is scary. I started the other poi blog and have felt a little hestitant, as I've been really... depressed.

There! I said it! Ha ha haaha hkarhurp... ha!

Yes, depressed. And I want to stop feeling embarrassed about it. After all, how bad can a guy who learned to spell embarrassed all on his own be.

It goes like this: I have a naturally tendency to get depressed. It's my artistic temperment. There are triggers. I still don't know what depression is, or how it works. Where are those lines, between thoughts and brain chemistry. Nobody really knows, as far as I know.

...but several years of financial crisis, and all the falling on my face I've done trying to get out of financial crisis hasn't helped. Yes, I need to learn to be happy even when things aren't going well. I would also probably benefit from maybe a little success or two, or knowing how I'm going to pay rent.

But this blog isn't about depression, really. It's about happiness. Or maybe it's about truth. And the truth is, I would really rather be happy.

The truth is, I am surrounded by amazing people who love me even when I hate myself.

The truth is, everybody has strengths and weaknesses.

So... there you go.

Happiness is watching Spock sing the Bilbo Baggins Balard.

http://www.tolkiencollector.com/bilbo5.mov

Logging out,

nick